Saturday, 18 August 2012

And So It Begins....

Welcome to the slightly strange world of The Creeps. A turbulent, often lively, regularly surprising, tornado in a bubble that is our daily lives. People who know us have said that I should write it down, as no one would ever believe it. So I am.

I decided that now was as good a time as any to start this bog, as we're about to embark on a new chapter in our lives. Extremely scary at the moment, but hopefully that will become a bit more exciting as time moves on.

I suppose I had better introduce 'the clan'.

Firstly, there's me. I never quite know how to start describing myself. I guess that I am all of the Heinz 57 varieties in one person. There are very few musical genres i don't like ('teeny pop' would be one. I have a plan of what to do with Justin Bieber, should I ever get hold of him, and believe me when I say that he would be singing a lot lower by the time I'd finished with him. And there'd be none of this 'Baby, Baby, Baby' shit, and a bit more of the 'please don't hurt me anymore'. Anyway, I digress.), We have approx 2-300 DVD's lurking around the place including everything from Thomas the Tank Engine to Napoleon Dynamite. I read as much as I can. We have about 400 books in the house and both Mr Creeps and I have a kindle each too.

I have a million food intolerances, the top of the list being certain fruit (Why not cake? Why the healthy stuff?), wheat, lactose, soya, and crustaceans (prawns, scampi, crab etc), and yeast. Mostly, I ignore them and take the meds. Except for the prawn thing. That's more of an allergy.

I spend too much time on Facebook and occasionally drop onto Twitter. I have an itch to have a look at Pinterest, but fear it would consume me. I also have an unhealthy interest in Spotify and have about 14 playlists ranging from Dubstep to Goth, via Metal and Bavarian Folk Punk Pop.

I get bored easily. Oh, and I suffer from atypical depression. And I'm scared of spiders. And I love zombies. And I'm a part-time member of the Bad Mother's Club.

I have been with Mr Creeps for over 14 years (you get less for murder, you know). Mr Creeps is my tall, growly man. He is absolutely brilliant at getting us discounts, extra stuff, value added, and all that jazz. He's also the person to take someone to task when the service has been shocking. He is mostly unafraid of anything (except Earwigs. He has a real issue with earwigs) and will stride where angels fear to tread. He does brush up nice, too.

Unfortunately, Mr Creeps has many, many problems with his health. He is due a third (and hopefully final) op on his sinuses in about 10 days to repair the fuck-up that was the last one. He also has an added complication of delayed bleeding post-operativley. Hopefully Haematology are going to come up with something for this in time. He's been on steriods for 2 years and is very sick of being sick.

He is also an avid gamer and is currently addicted to Star Wars: The Old Republic. Oh yeah. Nearly forgot. he's also a tattooist and body piercer.

Between us we are responsible for a motley collection of reprobates.

Featuring most largely in our lives are our Evil Monkeys, known only as '1' and '2'. They are 'nearly 6' and '4 and a HALF' respectively. They are the blight light of our lives and certainly know how to keep us on our toes. If someone is going to hurt themselves it will be Evil Monkey 2 (4 visits to A&E in 2 years, one of which was because she's split her head open showing off and another with a badly broken leg), whereas Evil Monkey 1 can throw a spectacular tantrum.

They're both waaaaay to clever for their own good.

Their older sister is currently 'Shewhowillnotbenamed' as I haven't yet asked her if it's okay of she appears in this blog. Anyway, she's at Uni studying Practical Media and thoroughly loving it.

Then there is the dog. In the loosest sense of the term 'dog'. Small, ginger, thinks he's human. A molting, mental, kamikaze food whore, who's scared of helicopters, police cars, the dark, and fireworks, but will sleep through a massive storm. His name is Rocky (we didn't choose it, but the IQ is about the same level), he's 7 years old, and he's a Patterdale Terrier cross. I think crossed with a tree stump. Head first.

There are also a selection of Grandparents, Aunties, Uncles, cousins, Godparents, honorary family, etc that will appear on and off, but I also have to get their permission before I can add them, but don't worry. They'll all make an appearance sooner or later....


  1. A great introductory post! I look forward to reading more :D

  2. Hi and welcome to the world of blogging. Soon it will start to take over your life!

    Herding Cats & Beneath Thy Feet

  3. Ha Ha ha brilliant. Can't wait to read some more

  4. Nice, made me want to hear more :) (pashmina from Bristol incase you hadn't guessed!)

    1. Took me a minute and then I read your reply. It's Sunday and my brain isn't yet working properly. :D